Tonight, We Feast

It started off as a typical lazy Saturday. I had decided, based on some very valuable advice, that I would try to have more meaningful conversations with Library Girl before I jumped head-first into asking her out. You know, something more than “Hello, I’d like to rent this copy of Yojimbo.” I don’t think she’d go out with me based solely on my stellar taste in movies. The trick would be to take it slower. Do things like learn her last name. I’m sure it’s not “Girl.”

This, of course, frees up my schedule for more sitting around.

So in my free time I gathered some choice food products and invited the one and only Sister J. over for dinner. She hadn’t been to my apartment since before I rescued my laz-z-boy from the unwanted furniture shelter, so she had not seen my bachelor pad in all its glory. She was quite impressed, although I knew she would be. The style in which I decorate and organize my apartment is influenced heavily by my three major role models; dad, mom, sister. Any one of them would be perfectly pleased with the way my apartment looks (except for the Brooke Burke swimsuit calendar. That one’s all me).

I cooked dinner for her, which was, of course, a radical turn of the tables. I was pleased to finally be able to return the favor of many a free meal at her place. I’m not one to flaunt my cooking skills, I am certainly no Iron Chef (though I’m becoming more and more certain that I am an Iron Monkey). I will say, however, that this particular dinner came out perfect. It was a feast of kings! Seriously, it was like the end of a Greek odyssey.

But, of course, my greatest contribution to the culinary arts came at dessert time. I filled two mugs with Cherry Garcia ice cream and almost left it at that when I spied a tiny sample bottle of Godiva chocolate liqueur in my fridge. It was a leftover from a former era, though which era I couldn’t remember; it might have been the Reagan administration. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to have it, I had just forgotten it was there. Until that morning, it had been obscured by a bag of vegetables which was so old it had moved to the next shelf on its own.

A tiny light, no bigger than the one in the refrigerator, went on in my head. Ice Cream: Chocolate and Cherry. Godiva: Chocolate and alcohol. No, it couldn’t possibly be a coincidence. I opened the bottle and hesitated before pouring it on the ice cream. I was suddenly afraid that combining two forces so powerful might end the universe. I decided to test fate.

I doubt I'm the first person to ever try this, but if I am, please forward my Nobel Peace Prize to my NH address because this could possibly the the greatest food combination ever.