It’s light again and I may have another chance to run. The sheriff’s going to have to act fast if he wants to catch me. The fact that I’m not swinging from the gallows right now says volumes about how poorly organized the town posse is. If my luck holds I can steal a horse at the edge of town and be across the Mexican border before they even realize I’m not home. If I can just get across the border I’ll be home free.

I have to wait, the enlisted men will go home in about half an hour, leaving only the deputy in charge until the sheriff comes into the office ten minutes later. I know this because I’ve always studied their schedule, afraid that I might someday need to know when to run. Today is that day.

I have only enough time to reflect on what got me here; where I made that bad decision that sent my whole world tumbling. Let me tell you about how I became a criminal.

I was at the mall. I always knew that if I was going to start a criminal career, no matter what kind, it was going to be at the mall. My mother was with me, she was offering to buy me some clothes for my birthday, so I could pick them out and she’d pay for them. Pretty sweet deal. Unfortunately, I trusted my fashion sense even less than hers, so I decided I would wait on new clothes until I could get the fashion advice of my sister.

On our way out of JCPenny (she always wanted to park near JCPenny), we saw a stack of catalogs near the door. We scanned the pile. No price tags, no signs. She had a coupon for a free catalog, but apparently they were all free. She took one. I grabbed one and thumbed through it. It had the men’s clothing selection, I could take it home and do some research on what was fashionable. I grabbed one and stuck it in my bag of books.

We left the store and got in our car. Something was tugging at the back of my mind, but I couldn’t say what the feeling was. I had started the engine and, on impulse, took a look at my new JCPenny catalog. Then I saw it, in the upper right corner of the cover. $5.

Holy shit! We just boosted a couple of JCPenny catalogs!

My mother, reminding me of the coupon she had, knew it wasn’t worth the trouble to return hers. I, however, had no coupon and no excuse.

It all came down to that moment. Would I go back and return the catalog, or would I just forget about it and take it home? This was the fulcrum of my life. I could be a good boy scout and return this crappy catalog of overpriced items or I could become a criminal, and speed away with my stolen goods.

In the end, I became a criminal. Not because of violence in the media or a careless society or a dysfunctional upbringing. I became a criminal because my feet were tired and it was cold out.